Love is...

...washing vomit off a pink fairy duvet at 3am. Being a mother means doing it naked in cold water. Such was my Friday night.

The good news is that the bug worked its way out (at 2 hourly intervals) in time for the Easter Sunday egg hunt and general chocolate extravaganza.

I love my daughter, my family and my life but forgive me for wishing I was elsewhere at 3am on Saturday morning.

I've had a lot of experience with such stuff and have come up with a few very important tips and considerations for the Goth Parent.

- NEVER let an ill child into your bed if you have satin, velvet or anything lush anywhere around the bed. If you sleep on rubber then go for your life.

- Black sheets are very cool but children will but all manner of bodily fluids on them at very frequent intervals and you can't boil wash black and keep the colour (believe me I've tried). This also applies to baby grows and vests / onesies. White / pale cotton really is the way to go. Then you get Grandma to stitch a fantastic quilt to go over the top of the bed so it looks both Goth and PINK.



- I have extended the rule above to our bed and the towels. I have boiled too much in the last three years to have any colour left.

I did have some beautiful black sleep suits and vest for Little Miss when she was a new born, but they got pooped and sicked on so much that they were grey within 6 weeks.

So take the wisdom of my experience; and sleep on rubber sheets if you want a good night's sleep with a sick child in the house.